I'M 24!

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 I’m 24!

I’ve just turned 24 months!  Hmmmm... doesn’t quite sound right….. I think it’s time to get rid of that ridiculous system that parents have of counting in months and start  counting in years like a normal sane person.

I’m 2!

Much better…yet not quite as impressive….

Anyway, spent a lot of time travelling in the last quarter. 2 trips to Sydney and one to Shanghai. All on airplanes. Airplanes are really cool, from the outside. They’re big and sleek and colourful and have things like dragons painted on them and they go really really fast and are really really loud…. and they can fly! On the inside though they’re boring as. White cylinders with small windows and, for me, large seats yet no space. I thought flying would be this amazing experience but, in actuality, it’s so boring everyone just sleeps or watches TV. How they managed to make something so incredible so boring I can’t understand as yet. Maybe when I’m older I’m sure the wisdom of age will provide the answers. The good thing is though that the parents will do anything to keep me quiet. I can eat what I want, watch what I want. Do basically anything I want as long as I’m quiet. It’s that disapproval of strangers thing again only intensified by the closed space and lack of escape. I think Mum and Dad are worried that if I don't shut up someone will strangle them. Or maybe me. In the latter case it will probably be them.

Had a birthday party while I was in Sydney and got lots of presents which was fun. Why are people worried about getting older? People give you stuff. I mean people give me stuff all the time but this time it’s a lot of new fun stuff all at once. Thanks to everyone who came along and if you didn’t get an invite it’s not because dads hopelessly disorganised or thought you might not be interested but, because I probably don't like you, sorry.

We went to shanghai also. While there we stayed with my aunt and uncle and their dog. I was scared of the dog at first, but, by the end of the stay, he was far more scared of me…..

Dad’s also written a couple of articles about me that, after the more cynical yet humorous observations were edited out, were published in the south china morning post.  So I’m famous! Or I should be. He changed the names to protect the innocent so, disappointingly, I’m just another pleb like all of you.

Though I do have a website…

We went to see a “classical music for babies” concert by the Hong Kong Philharmonic Orchestra. There's a photo on the site of how much I enjoyed Strauss’ Blue Danube waltz. It’s the one with my hands over my ears and the expression on my face that looks like I’ve given up any hope of ever finding happiness again. They did play Hall of the Mountain King a bit latter though which was much more my style.

Also started a new school. Actually it’s the old school, the first school, again. The same school I left to go to the second school but this time the school’s at a different place to both the first (same) and the second (different) schools. ie a different school but at the same school as before. Clear? (stupid language). Go by myself now with no parents hanging around. Finally.

They’ve taught me the alphabet song/twinkle twinkle little star and numbers and a few other things. Most import of which is I don't need a relo around all the time. Although I did stubbornly scream a lot before I realised they were right.

We’ve also learned days of the week. I’m not very good at it. Can’t really tell what day it is without knowing what day it was yesterday and just counting along. Not a good system that one. If everyone was the same we'd all just be counting to seven over and over again for months, years, decades, centuries, even millennium!  Ad nauseam, which would be really stupid.

I know there must be more to it than that though. Some way to tell what day it is that I’ll understand when I’m older. Probably involving the TV guide.

Still struggling with colours and now also with personal pronouns.  They make no sense and serve no purpose. It’s weird, sometimes I is me but also sometimes I is you.  You can also be me and me, you. How does that work? I would have thought that you could never be me. No matter how much you might want to be.  Completely confusing. And unnecessary…. if everyone was just wise enough to have a single syllable name….

That’s about it really. 

Cheers

Rhys ....

Happy new year everyone,

Welcome to 2013. I’m not yet 3 but this is my third new year…..does that make sense?  Looking forward to learning this maths thing. It should not be confusing at all……

Sorry I’ve been a bit slack on updating this site. Things have been a bit hectic over here with my new brother on the way soon and everything.

Mum and dad apparently moved us all to our new home from level 41 to the same unit on level 16 in the same building. We just get in the same small magical room with the mirrors, press 16 instead of 41, and it teleports us, as it always did,  to what seems to me to be the exact same house. So moving house is just the same as changing the code. What all the fuss was about I don't know. . I suspect we didn’t actually move at all. You can’t trust these adults. 

I’ve been learning my letters and numbers. The alphabet song is coming along well though I sometimes get it confused with twinkle twinkle little star.  The bit between K and Q is also a bit confusing. Not exactly sure what the letter lmnop  is supposed to mean. Also can’t understand why there are so many things that double up. With all the capital and lower case letters and numbers whoever designed this language only needed 62 different symbols and yet zero and O are the same. A capital double U is actually a double V, one and I are basically the same and many others (2Z, 5S etc.) are similar. What genius could not come up with a mere 62 distinctively different characters? The Chinese have thousands!...but that’s another set of issues. And what is with C and K? Bit redundant. Who is in charge of this stuff?

I’ve started asking “why?” This should be a powerful tool for me to learn things but the answers are usually quite useless. I’ve decided grown ups in general, and mum and dad in particular, don't really understand anything. If you drill down far enough (why?why?why?) the answer usually turns out to be “because”. Not sure exactly what “because” is. Think it’s a bit like “The Force”.

I talk a lot these days. Just like dad….

Time is also a concept I’m starting to wrap my head around. Bedtime, luchtime, dinnertime, time to go….all pretty straight forward. “NOW” is when we should be doing whatever it is I want to do. Tomorrow is a good time to do anything I don't want to do. I do like this concept. Sometimes it’s Tuesday. Sometimes it’s Sunday. Can’t remember it ever being Tomorrow. It’s a good time to do unappealing things.

Sometime since the last website update I managed to successful pass toilet training. This moved my official status from Baby Boy to Little Boy. Dad wrote an article about it which, after it was completely sanitised, was then published in the paper. Fame is so glamorous.

Got a bike from my aunt for Christmas. I can ride really well. Despite it having training wheels I’ve managed to crash it a few times. Dad says that takes real skill.

Have a new brother arriving in a month or two. Looking forward to it though not sure what to expect. Hopefully he’ll play with me. Maybe he can ride my bike….

Cheers

Rhys